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Joke of the Day
"The reason the Japanese kill so many whales is because they remind them of Americans"
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"""Why did you dry these grapes?"" ""No raisin"""
"So I was using a zester on a lemon recently, when I paused for a second and realised... ..that I was only just scratching the surface."
"When I Die When I die, I want my last words to be ""I left a million dollars under the..."""
"I was thinking about where Luke Skywalker goes to buy his change of clothes while talking to my girlfriend. Me: I wonder where Luke Skywalker buys his clothes. Her: The Darth Maul. ;) I love my life."
"What do you do when your giant is hurt ? You call 9-wun-wun"
"I'll pay extra for the hairdresser comfortable with silence."
"What's the worst way to lose your job? By firing squad."
"So I organized a threesome last night.... There were a couple of no-shows, but I still had fun."
"What's the worst part about being black and Jewish? Having to sit at the back of the oven with the rest of the dirty niggers."