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Joke of the Day

"How do you distinguish a French tank from a British tank? The rear-view mirrors"

"What do you call... A cow with one leg? Lean beef What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef What do you call a cow with two legs? Your mom"

"Leaving a watermelon on someone's doorstep in the middle of night is a pretty inexpensive way to occupy a portion of their mind forever."

"If I'm found dead in the bathtub clutching a toaster, check for Pop-Tarts before jumping to conclusions."

"I learned about genetic mutation in biology today. It was my first class."

"Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door? He wanted to win the no bell prize!"

"What idiot called it a driver's test and not a Game of Cones?"

"The helicopter was invented after Chuck Norris was observed doing 8 roundhouse kicks a second."

"Who knows how to sing Mariah Carey songs? Not Mariah Carey"

"Did you hear about the cow that jumped over the barbed wired fence? It was udder catastrophe!"