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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a chicken staring intently at a piece of lettuce? A chicken ceaser salad."
Next Joke
"What are your thoughts on new soup technology? I say Progresso at any cost."
"My girlfriend calls it selective hearing. I prefer to call it drama filtering."
"What's the difference between Beer Nuts and Deer Nuts? Beer nuts are $1.29 a bag. Deer nuts are just under a buck."
"Learn from the mistakes of others. You won't live long enough to make them all yourself."
"I've got a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start."
"""I didn't go to grad school to assemble agenda folios for the quarterly board meeting"" I think as I drizzle Dawn into the CEO's coffee pot."
"Sorry I borrowed your pen and performed that emergency tracheotomy that turned out not to be an emergency. And sorry about your neck hole."
"Hey guys, don't you just hate it when you're woken up in the middle of the night for sex? can't wait to get out of prison."
"School says strangers are handing out lick on LSD tattoos. I told my kids not to worry, no one is giving out good shit like that for free"