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Joke of the Day

"At my trial the judge asked me how i justified using force to get women to sleep with me... Apparently ""Because I'm a Jedi"" wasn't a good enough excuse"

"What did the elephant say to the naked man? Dude, how the hell do you breathe through that thing?!?"

"I DO love to rush breathlessly into Starbucks and scream ""Is anyone in here writing a screen play? We need one! This is an emergency!"""

"House Hunters: ""We want a slide, cheeseburgers, a clown."" Realtor: Are you describing McDonalds? ""haha no"" *3 kids tumble out of trenchcoat*"

"What did Mike Tyson say when he saw Breaking Bad? That's methed-up!"

"If I had a dollar for every time I was racially accepting I'd be as poor as a no good, dirty mexican."

"How does a Chinese cat say hello? Mi Hao."

"When Shall We Meet Again ? by Miles Apart"

"Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me 53 times a day, you're an Instagram filter."

"What is the difference between ""ooo"" and ""aaa""? About three centimeters."