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Joke of the Day

"I don't think anyone here is a serial killer because you have to be really self motivated and it's like we all just eat snacks and take naps"

"I learned from 'The Exorcist' That when it comes to souls, possession is 9/10 of the law. Changed slightly from a comment made by /u/boobiesucker"

"Why did the zombie start ripping up sheet music? Because he was de-composing."

"""Does this leaf make me look fat?"" - Eve."

"Wives are magicians They can turn anything into an argument."

"Hey, companies. No one has their confirmation number. You're the company, you do the work."

"I hate those people who knock on your door... And tell you that you need to be saved or you'll burn... Stupid firemen."

"What do you call a bird who never remembers song lyrics? A hummingbird"

"Drake the type of nigga to get a wanted star in Grand Theft Auto, drive to the police station and turn himself in."

"How amazing is it that nobody in the same Kingdom as Cinderella , had the same sized feet as her ? She should play the lottery too !"