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Joke of the Day

"I don't really suffer from insomnia. It's more of an all-night panic attack about everything that has and hasn't yet occurred in my life."

"The doctor said I had a bad case of kyphosis. ""Are you sure?"" I said. He replied, ""Honestly, it's just a hunch."" Edit: [Jokes are funnier when explained](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kyphosis)."

"How do Germans tie their shoes? In little nazis"

"Did you hear about the dog who went to the flea circus? He stole the show."

"How do you know you've satisfied a redhead? She unlocks the handcuffs. Edit: for everyone that isn't getting it, it means kinky sex"

"You must have been born on a highway... Beacuse that's where most accidents happen"

"There are 10 types of people Those who understand binary and those who don't"

"I just pooped my pants in the elevator. I'm taking this shit to a whole nother level."

"I've never played Jenga, but I have had to extricate myself from a sleeping toddler in my bed, so I think I could handle it."

"I'm really looking forward to the next stop on my Mediterranean cruise. The captain said we're just a few clicks out from Harem Bay."