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Joke of the Day

"What's the smartest muscle in the human body? The anal sphincter; it can differentiate solid, liquid, and gas."

"A horse walks into a bar... The Barkeeper asks:""hey dude, why the long face?"" The horse has cancer."

"What do you call a sick bird who has crossed a national border without consent? An ILL-EAGLE! 2X COMBO"

"When you call a dog they usually come to you. When you call a cat; they take a message."

"I miss you like... post your funny ending! let's see what we get..."

"what are your hobbies? Mmm... Sam, Bilbo and Frodo."

"You know what always brings me down? Gravity."

"Where is the only place engineers are considered artistic? Brooklyn"

"I like my children how I like my essays. Unplanned and poorly executed"

"I told my girlfriend she should work at UPS She's good at handling packages"