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Joke of the Day

"Me: My father's name is LAUGHING and my Mother's name is SMILING. Teacher: You must be Kidding? Me: No, that's my brother. I'm JOKING."

"I try not to associate myself with bowlers They're all a bunch of pinheads"

"I wouldn't say I ""missed"" your call."

"Hey girl, how 'bout some head? - Henry VIII"

"What is Jared's favorite part of a hockey game? Before the first period."

"The hardest part What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? The wheel chair"

"The doctor says I cut my sentences short."

"What's the difference between premature ejaculation and erectile dysfunction? One's pretty quick, the other's a quitty prick."

"If Donald Trump becomes president, and Boris Johnson becomes UK's PM... It'll be like toupees in a pod."

"Why can't your children be like my office voice mail? Seen but not heard"