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Joke of the Day

"A doctor tells a woman she can no longer touch anything alcoholic. So she gets a divorce."

"The Trump presidency will be fine... Remember when NWO took over WCW? In the end, it turned out ok too."

"Rant ""What do we want!?"" ""No daylight savings!"" ""When do we want it!?"" ""An hour ago!!!"""

"[In the gym] hey guys it'd be a lot easier to lift these weights if we worked together"

"Anyone looking for a job should consider becoming an elephant circumsiser... ... the pay isn't too great, but the tips are enormous!"

"I don't understand why my coworkers always complain when I microwave my favorite meal: curry salmon stuffed with burnt popcorn."

"what does one rock use to propose to another rock? A bouldering. (Sorry guys ive been indoor rock climbing lately)"

"I heard there are hillbillies dressing up as clowns and threatening people... They call themselves the Ku Klux Klown"

"Waking up with morning wood is one thing, but waking with Elijah Wood is just creepy. I calmed down once I stared into his beautiful eyes."

"Why did the boy laugh when he was molested by a test? Because the testicles"