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Joke of the Day

"i'm just like one of the ladies in the commercials! dancin around with nair on my pits! usin a tampon as a mic as i lipsync the cranberries!"

"Have you heard the joke about recursion?"

"Caveman1: look, I invent wheel Caveman2: what we do now? Caveman1: wait for Jesus to take wheel Caveman2: dum dum Jesus not invented yet"

"What was wrriten on a sign at the entrance of a gas chamber in the Holocaust? Watch your step"

"People immediately behave better in traffic once they notice the Elf on the Shelf tied to my grille."

"the american journal of medicine says diarrhea is hereditary. .. ...it runs in the jeans."

"Q: What is the difference between Windows 95 and Windows 98? A: 3 years"

"A priest, a pedophile and a homosexual walk in to a bar... And that was just the first guy."

"The most judgmental aquatic mammal is probably the seal of disapproval."

"NEWS ITEM. Kidnappers grabbed a little boy and two days later sent him home with a ransom note. His parents immediately sent the kid back with the money."