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Joke of the Day

"My ex... My ex was like a rock pool. Shallow, but interesting. And upon closer inspection I found crabs."

"Girl finds out that she's pregnant... And goes to tell her mum about it. Her mum asks; ""Have you had a check-up?"" Girl says; ""No, he was Polish"""

"CAPS LOCK ON caps lock off CAPS LOCK ON caps lock off - Mr Miyagi [2014]"

"If I ever start a customer service company, I'm going to name it 'Hold Please'."

"Why did the rabbit eat lunch under the sink? He found a leek there."

"How many women does it take to make me a sandwich? What the fuck are you waiting for bitch? Get in there and make me a fucking sandwich!!!"

"What do you call it when a video game character gets hair on his body? Q*berty. (my kids wrote this!)"

"How do you outsmart a chicken? By thinking outside the bawks."

"Why did the baker have smelly hands? Because he needed a poo."

"I hate it when I'm trying to discreetly pick a wedgie in public and inadvertently end up doing every dance routine from Spice World."