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Joke of the Day

"What do the Dallas Cowboys do when they win the Superbowl? Turn off their Nintendo and go to bed."

"Q. Why do blondes smile when it's lightning? A. Because, they think they are having their picture taken."

"I'm beginning to think I'm a terrible host. Hubs says it's rude to answer every question with ""I don't know. Get the fuck out of my house."""

"If u love someone and they don't love u back the first thing you need to do is make them a scrapbook with you both in little wedding outfits"

"I've only heard the setup for this joke, anybody know the rest? A Jew and a Pollock are in a rainstorm... That's all I know and I've been dying to find out the rest. Anybody have any ideas?"

"Dear god, please let me have sex at least as often as adobe or java needs an update. Everyday."

"My favorite Caesar quote. ""Pizza! Pizza!"""

"Money doesn't impress me. You know what does? Treehouses."

"I should have just named my dog ""Password""."

"Lazy fact 25428394692846 You didn't read that number"