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Joke of the Day

"Every marriage counselor should be replaced by robots... because they take arguments and return values."

"Q: Men will brag that there are women waiting by the phone at this very moment for their call. Who are these women? A: Women working at 900 numbers."

"They said ""orange is the new black""... ...but I didn't realise they meant Trump would replace Obama."

"A #colon has only two job options: become a punctuation mark, or work for an asshole."

"Is it wrong to hate a certain race? I'm ok with a 5km but really don't like 10km."

"friendship is so weird.. you just pick a human you've met and you're like ""yup I like this one"" and you just do stuff with them"

"People call me ""big"", ""dumb"", and ""stupid"", which confuses me because I'm actually not very big"

"How do you call a prison inmate? With a cell phone."

"My Home Internet Password 2kids1dog. Thats an orgy I don't want to be apart of."

"Harry Potter knock knock joke Knock knock Who's there? You know You know who? Avada Kedavra!!!!!"