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Joke of the Day

"After my girlfriend got pregnant, everything changed. My address, my job, my phone number..."

"An Irishman walks out of a bar... The End."

"Honey can you buy me a new phone? What about the other one? He's buying me a tablet."

"As a guy, it's not that I have anything against psychiatric wards... I'm just afraid of commitment."

"What's the difference between a microwave and butt fucking? A microwave doesn't brown your meat."

"TIFU by climbing into a German U-Boat Whoops. Wrong sub."

"If my DVR cuts off the last joke of my favorite sitcom one more time, I swear im gonn... **FREMULON**"

"What is that white thing in my pork&beans? The Queen Bean. *Blatantly stolen from Ren & Stimpy"

"I'm starting a fight club... First rule is tell everyone you know because I have no members yet"

"Jail isn't supposed to be fun why do they get bunk beds?"