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Joke of the Day

"Really upset about this migration crisis... My SSD's sectors are misaligned, and it's really bugging me."

"How can you tell if a road is sad? It has low shoulders."

"What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing they are both stuck up cunts"

"The worst thing about being bitten by a poisonous spider is... You're probably Australian"

"What do you call a sad terrorist? A crisis"

"What do you call a ghost that stays out all night? Afresh air freak."

"New egg is so Corny (Have they always done this) http://oi61.tinypic.com/33kak2a.jpg"

"So I was having sex with this girl.. When suddenly she asks me: ""Doesn't it bother you that I'm 13??"" So I replied: ""Not really, I've never been superstitious"""

"What's the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with large tits? One's a crusty bus station and the other's a busty crustacean"

"Spoiler alert: this milk expired five days ago"