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Joke of the Day

"When you have to deliver bad news, always lead with something worse: ""Honey, our cat died. Just kidding! But, I forgot to buy cat food."""

"I don't know who the pun editor of the NY Post is, but the headline PEACHES' DEATH IS STILL FUZZY deserves a citation and/or beating."

"I like my coffee like I like my women... No Penis"

"Two guys walked into a bar.. You would think one of them would of ducked!"

"Why do Asian people never seem to age? I met a chinese girl today & I estimate her age to be somewhere between 4 & 197."

"""It helps knowing that everyone else will die with me if we crash."" ~my 11yo on why she's not afraid to fly unaccompanied"

"What's the difference between a Goodyear tire and 365 condoms? One is a Goodyear and one is a great year"

"I've saved a ton of money on Birthday Cards by switching to Facebook!"

"Mcdonalds showing people doing yoga in their commercials is like George Bush having a library named after him."

"Starbucks? Yes I'd like a tepid mug of milk froth please. My name's Adam, but you can call me Aldin."