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Joke of the Day

"Mom called. She was worried. Thought maybe I moved because I haven't answered her email and she wouldn't know the new address to send it to."

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"when you write a word and it looks wrong but it's right and you just sit there and contemplate life"
"The Worst ""F"" Word Finals"
"two blondes walked into a bar You thought one of them would of seen it"
"What is the pig's favorite musical instrument? The piggalo (piccalo)."
"*smashes bag of Oreos *pours on top of salad"
"If you ever need help learning C++, I can give you some pointers. And you can keep me as a reference."
"What does a british man say when he's about to climax? I'm arriving"
"So I found out today that my diarrhea is hereditary It runs in my jeans Credit to /u/jdabarber"
"[Religon] What's black and religous? The jews after hitler godammit how 2 spell religeone?!?!?!?!?"