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Joke of the Day

"I had no idea Instagram was down until a girl in front of me at Starbucks cancelled her order, saying ""Instagram is down it's useless"""

"What do you get when you cross a hit of acid with a birth control pill? A trip without the kids."

"The biggest Myth is to solve problems of MATH"

"Why are Juggalos obsessed with hatchets? Felons can't buy guns"

"Went to my uncle's funeral today open bar pretty good food but my uncle was dead 3/5 stars"

"""I believe I can fry"" - R Kelly filling out McDonald's application"

"My ex left me for an attorney. It makes me smile every day to know he hasn't won an arguement for 15 years."

"Wife: ""I think I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?"" Husband: ""You have perfect eyesight."""

"Where there's a will there's an ""OMG! What's it say!? What does it say?""."

"I hate when Doctors asks questions like . . . ""Are you sexually active?"" Depends on what you mean by ""active"". There are plenty of ""active"" volcanoes that haven't gone off in over 50 years."