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Joke of the Day

"I don't know why people are surprised when I tell them my Grandfather Made it out of Auschwitz. Most of the German officers did."

"The only reason /r/funny is funny"

"I had an artist put a tattoo of an asshole put over my asshole. That way I can say, ""Are you referring to me or my tattoo?"""

"My name is Holly. What's my drunk superhero name? AlcoHolly."

"Whats the difference between Game of Thrones and Twitter? Twitter only allows 160 characters"

"How do you make an orphans hands bleed? Tell them to clap until daddy gets home"

"Why do volleyball player want to join the armed forces? For the chance to gain some experience in the service."

"What is a great game for unvaccinated children? Marco Polio"

"I don't mean to brag but my stalker has OCD so he trims my bushes while he's hiding in them waiting for me to get home."

"I bought a book on eBay called ""How to Scam on eBay"". It still hasn't arrived."