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Joke of the Day

"Jessica Biel's dad's first name is Batmo."

"If you get behind in your reading check you're not sitting on your book."

"What do you call a make-believe country for wizards? A magi nation"

"Whenever I'm feeling like shit,... I simply go on YouTube, search for Skrillex videos and read the comments. Instantly, I feel a lot better."

"Religion is like farts... Everyone likes the smell of their own, but not someone doing it in their face. Hope it hasn't been said before :)"

"What did the snowman eat for breakfast? Frosted snow flakes. My 4.5 y/o son came up with this joke, but his punch line was ""snow flakes"". I added the ""frosted"". Teamwork."

"Nothing says ""I'm an American"" more than ordering a pizza online and tweeting about it and then hating soccer."

"Apparently champagne is the easiest alcohol to digest, so I'm going to consume several bottles to wash down my salad."

"If you refuse to take a nap... Are you resisting a rest?"

"When I fight Authority, Authority always makes me submit a lot of paperwork."