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Joke of the Day

"SUBWAY EMPLOYEE: What would you like- ME: I'D LIKE TO CREATE A SHOW ABOUT DOGS COOKING PIZZAS SE: -on your sub? ME: PUPPERONI"

"What do you call a British woman with a yeast infection? An English muffin"

"What's the difference between a penis and a Christmas present? You wrap the present *after* you put it in the box."

"Kid: ""I want to be a doctor when I grow up."" Mom: ""You can't. Your hands aren't cold enough."""

"The penis mightier than the sword. haha penis."

"I have to start remembering my passwords, I have renamed the dog so many times he just looks at me with disgust now."

"I have sixth sense, I see stupid people."

"There was a black woman who was having period problems. The black woman went to her doctor and the doctor asked her ""whats your flow like?"" and the black woman responded ""linoleum"""

"you'll know you're a grown-up when you keep fifteen unnecessary pillows on your bed"

"What type of underwear does a fetus wear? Fruit of the womb."