159079

Joke of the Day

"Sometimes I feel a seal is just a neutral sea lion Neutral as in Without an ion"

"I'm Thirsty! Hey Thirsty, I'm Friday. Wanna go out on Saturday for a Sunday? ^I'm^sorry"

"How do you make your girlfriend scream during sex? Call her and tell her."

"You're breaking up with me because I ""don't put food in the correct things?"" WTF? After I've JUST made you a delicious bowl of toast??"

"What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Poop"

"How does every ethnic joke start? By looking over your shoulder"

"A Roman walks into the bar... ...holds up two fingers, and says, ""Five beers, please."""

"My wife asked my why i carry a gun in the house. I looked at her and said ""Decepticons"". She laughed, i laughed, the toaster laughed, i shot the toaster. It was a good time."

"BAD: When your date has been in the Men's Room for 45 mins. WORSE: When the 6 yo girl at the table next to you says ""he's not coming back"""

"Did you know that papa johns was delivering to the twin towers on nine eleven? The order was for two large planes!"