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Joke of the Day

"What's the dirtiest language? Latin, its absolutely filled with *cum*."

"What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo? One is really heavy, the others a little lighter."

"What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? a Lickalotopuss"

"When life hands you alligators, make gator aid."

"Now I'm not saying I'm a good businessman But I spent $534 million less than Hillary Clinton to not become President."

"Why did the bee go to the doctor? Because he had hives Badum tsh"

"What's an Islamic extremist's favorite baseball team? The new york Jets"

"It would be easier on everyone if my kids' teachers would cut out the middle man and email my homework assignments directly to me."

"My wife takes 13 bikinis for a 4-day beach trip. Meanwhile, I'm rocking the swimming trunks my mom bought at K-Mart in 1991."

"My wife is SO immature... I was upstairs taking a bath, and she walks in, and for NO REASON WHATSOEVER she sunk all my boats."