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Joke of the Day

"Who is the most successful liar in the world? Mary. Lied about her extramarital affair, still believed by billions."

"Men Are Polite When wearing a bikini, women reveal 90% of their body....men are so polite they only look at the covered parts"

"What's the dumbest animal in the jungle? A polar bear"

"How many surrealists does it take to change a lightbult? To get to the other side."

"Always hit women with a left hook... ...because they don't deserve any rights"

"[first date] *Ok don't let her know you're a vampire* ""Would you like a mint?"" *reaches in pocket, pulls out SPF 5,000,000,000* ""Dammit"""

"Paddy and Michael are out walking when Paddy falls down a well.... Michael shouts down ""Paddy! have you broken anything???"" Paddy replies ""No! there's nothing down here to break!"""

"What's the difference between a shooting range and an American college? About thirty thousand dollars a year."

"My mate sold me a guitar for 5... No strings attached"

"The Longest joke in the world (sorry if re-post) it's totally worth it! [7 Page Joke](http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/2a5xwx/truthmafia.com/archives/1554)"