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Joke of the Day

"A black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder... and the bartender says: ""hey where'd you get that? It looks exotic."" And the parrot says: ""Africa."""

"Spanish: The h is silent English: Many letters can be silent French: All letters are meaningless, every living thing is born without reason"

"What insect lives on nothing? A moth because it eats holes."

"I like my coffee like I like my women In two enormous cups"

"People keep complaining about 'Let it Go'... The song never bothered me anyway."

"You deserve a handjob from Edward Scissorhands."

"Me: [bursts into wife's meeting] BABE, IT HAPPENED! Wife: Dave, I'm at wo- Me: I paid for 6 [empties chicken nuggets on table] I got 7"

"For Christmas last year I got a sweater. This year I'd prefer a moaner or a squirter."

"Why was Joseph late to the meeting? He was Stalin."

"Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car."