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Joke of the Day

"Why is it a good idea to put your money in the freezer, instead of the bank? So you always have access to cold hard cash..."

"What do you call citizens of Florida who eat at Chick-Fil-A? Gay-ters"

"What's the difference between a hippie chick and a hockey player? A hockey player takes a shower after three periods."

"There's no way witnessing the birth of your child is better than seeing your luggage come out first on the baggage carousel."

"Why did Blitzkrieg work so well in France? Because lightning always follows the path of least resistance"

"What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians? a drummer ..."

"Other than THAT Ms. Lincoln, how was the play?"

"What did the NSA say to Russia after the blizzard? We're Snowden!"

"I don't have to be attractive. I am an asshole. Women swarm to me."

"When a clock is hungry... ...it goes back four seconds."