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Joke of the Day

"How do you make a whore shut up? Tell her to put a cock in it"

"What is Harry Potter's favorite way to get down a hill? Walking. JK ROLLING"

"At the school for the hearing impaired... ...no one can hear you scream!"

"What was the border patrol agent's greatest regret? The Juan that got away."

"A Trump supporter asked an opponent what the candidate should do for the American taxpayer. The opponent laughed and said, ""How about becoming one himself?"""

"*Sees ant carrying a leaf that weighs 3x its body weight* Wife: Can you imagine being that strong? Me: *Picking up leaf* Yes."

"FACT: If you don't own a suit, you get to stay in your twenties forever."

"Why was 11 afraid of 12? Because 12 13 14!!!!! GET IT?!?!??! source: some comment on reddit I read like 6 months ago"

"I saw a ""best at sex"" contest for gay men, where the judges were your fellow participants. It looked fun, so I entered the competition."

"Why did the Papal Palace fill up with kittens? Because the Pope was a cat-holic. Eh? Eh?"