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Joke of the Day

"Where do all the normies play? In the areeeeeiiiiiiiiina"

"Have you heard of the new successful therapy for ADHD/ADD patients? It's called Concentration camp therapy. (Sorry for untasteful reference)"

"men: women are very hard to read women: actually, we just want- men: such complex creatures women: if u just liste- men: so mysterious"

"Whats the difference between a USB and the USA? One has standards."

"You know what the problem with biplanes is? You never know what direction they are going."

"Dad: Let's talk, we never talk. Me: Okay. I kinda wanna tell you something... Dad: You can tell me anything. Me: I'm Batman. Dad: Get out."

"I may not be perfect, but at least I'm not fake."

"Holiday tip: remember, you only have a few days left to drop out of people's lives to avoid buying gifts. You're welcome."

"Teacher: Fill out the parent form. Me: Why? Teacher: So I can contact you if your kid gets in trouble. Me: *writing* Raised. By. Wolves."

"Throw a baby badger so high that when it lands on your enemy it's fully grown and very upset. You left town years ago. The perfect crime."