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Joke of the Day

"Yo mama so poor she was in K-Mart with a box of Hefty bags. I said ""What ya doin'?"" She said ""Buying luggage."""

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"It'd be nice if the married people would leave some of the single people for the rest of the single people."
"What do you call a large group of people who spit on others? The Salivation Army."
"Babies love to shake things, but hate to be shaken. It's like, pick a side, babies."
"How many hippies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. Hippies screw in tents."
"TIL Lebanese people are from the fugawi tribe. When they walked out of the airport they said we're the fugawi."
"How does a hamster propose to his girlfriend? With a hamst-ring! I'm sorry."
"Coffee at McDonald's is like sex in prison You'll have no trouble getting it, but it's rough."
"I met a Wheelchair user yesterday. He's a stand up guy."
"*walks into Babies R Us* Hi I'd like to buy a baby. ""Sir we don't-"" *I slide him a 100 dollar bill* ""This way please."""