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Joke of the Day

"CATCHING A SQUIRREL Q: How do you catch a squirrel? A: Climb up a tree and act like a nut."

"Mrs Saggy: Mrs Wrinkly tried to have a facelift last week. Mrs Baggy: Tried to? Mrs Saggy: Yes they couldn't find a crane strong enough to lift her face!"

"How does an apple a day keep the doctor away? When you take careful aim."

"What did the ocean said to the river when they parted ways ? Nothing, he was just full of tears"

"what do you call dried cum? sement"

"The only way to protect ourselves from eagle attacks is of course MORE eagles. Fill our homes with these gentle, knife clawed birds of prey."

"If pro and con are opposites... Is progress the opposite of Congress?"

"What is a Jew's favorite Mexican food? Carne Masada"

"What did the chicken say after laying an egg? ""Oeuf!"""

"Why did the USA bomb the kebab shop? Because there was a rumor they were harboring free radicals."