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Joke of the Day
"Which nut is the angriest? The pistachio."
Next Joke
"Why did the train engineer go on a rampage? He had a loco-motive."
"What's white and covers the road in the early morning? Employed people."
"Dear 6-year-old me: As an adult you won't need to know cursive but you will need an ability to type with your thumbs. The future is weird."
"Looks like Trump is going to lose the presidency I guess his erection is going cost him the election"
"I went to the store to buy 50ft of rope. The guy at the store said ""This spool of rope is on clearance for only $2. It's 500ft long."" ""Nah man"" I said ""I hate long good buys."""
"Kevin and Stuart both named Bob as the sole beneficiary in their wills.... They made him a Multi Minion Heir"
"robber 1: *puts ski mask on head* you grab the money while i kiss all the bankers robber 2: huh? robber 1: uh i meant kill *hides lipstick*"
"What did the vertebrate say to the invertebrate? Always thought you was a bit spineless."
"Ever hear about the Latino doctor that collects inkwells? Nobody expects the Spanish ink physician."