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Joke of the Day

"THE HUMAN BODY 12 Wildly inconsistent design. Leaks fluids. Zero protection from drop damage. Can be killed by bees/peanuts. NOT RECOMMENDED"

"If you are unhappy with this status update, please press 0 to speak with a customer service representative. Just kidding! Kiss my ass"

"There's a new biographic movie about Tolstoi TolStory coming soon to theaters near you"

"Dad: Look at this cute photo of my baby Just kidding, this isn't freaking Facebook!"

"There was an accident involving 2 cars in mexico 17 people were injured."

"Why are rivers lazy? Because they never get off their beds."

"When you get laid off. :("

"I'm on chapter two of the dictionary and this thing is just so disconnected. Like, what happened to the aardvark from the beginning?"

"Why are knives always the funniest students at utensil school? Because they're the class cut-ups."

"Why did Wolverine stop checking his e-mail? He kept forgetting his Logan and password."