156106

Joke of the Day

"You can't fix stupid but you can fantasize about slapping the shit out of it."

"It was a blessing that grandpa past away peacfully in his sleep, but tragic for the passengers in his car."

"News knowledge is important. I was discussing with a guy about the Gaza Strip. He thought it was the adhesive side of a maxi pad."

"Whiskey diet I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already"

"My friend got a rash from some suntan lotion he was using. He wanted to sue the company for billions. He was being irrational."

"What did the pornstar say after getting a cumshot in the eye? ""I didn't see that coming"""

"What is the difference between a straight man's mustache and a gay man's mustache? The smell."

"Why is Russian the most dangerous language to learn? Because it's Russki."

"I was bit by a rattlesnake last summer. After three days of excruciating pain the snake died"

"I don't usually sleep enough, but when I do, its still not enough."