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Joke of the Day

"Advice in elections How do you win an election? By giving out candy"

"ATTENTION: We will be performing live power tool identification exercises today. This is not a drill."

"Tom Brady got punished more than Ray Rice because he beat a whole team"

"During WW2, oil shortages forced some countries to start using organic fuels. Mussolini made the trains run on thyme."

"Two fish were in a tank. One says, you man the main cannon, I'll drive."

"A little Jewish boy asks his Jewish father for 40$... Father: 30$! what do you need 20$ for?!"

"What's a dinosaurs least favorite reindeer? COMET"

"Autocorrect wants to capitalize bacon, out of respect."

"why does everyone in breath mint commercials have to be so horny"

"Prostitutes are like cigarettes. As a kid, you think you're never gonna try it. When you start getting older, you think, ""why not just once?"". Soon enough, you're addicted. And broke."