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Joke of the Day

"angel: where'd all the zebras go? God: I put 'em in the desert angel: dude their camouflage was for the snow God: I know lol"

"Having an Internet girlfriend is easier than having a real girlfriend because I don't have to suck my gut in."

"At this point, every item on drive-thru menus should have ""Uhhh..."" in front of it."

"Why are almost all brides dresses white? So the dishwasher matches the washing machine"

"A couple are having trouble with their marriage... Wife: We used to have something special Jon! Something rare and precious! What happened to that? Husband: You spent it all dear."

"I don't really care for the New England Patriots, but Lance Armstrong used a deflated ball for years and no one said anything."

"Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven eight nine. Why was seven afraid of eight? Induction."

"Snake walks into a bar. Game over"

"Arnold Schwarzenegger and windows 10 Just after windows 10 was released, Arnold was asked if he was ever going to upgrade to windows 10. His response? 'I still love Vista, baby.'"

"Why do seagulls live by the sea? If they lived by the bay they'd be bagels."