152224

Joke of the Day

"I respect the guy who drives his Blue BMW through the White Castle drive thru. It's like he's saying: ""I'm better than youbut not by much."""

"My gf could be a an NFL running back she will *not* go down."

"A puzzling amount of nonsense... If you're sailing through the desert and your house gets a flat how many flapjack a would it take to put that motherfucker up on stilts?"

"I have been using teeth whitener, and now they are completely oblivious to the experiences and sufferings of other peoples."

"Gary Johnson withdraws from the Libertarian Ticket. Replaced by Harambe. That's right. Johnsons out for Harambe!"

"How do you determine the personality of a hot dog? Give it an Oscar-Myers-Briggs test"

"Why couldn't Stevie Wonder see his friends? Because he 's married."

"What do you call a waffle you drop in the desert? San Diego ^^San-dee-eygo ^^^^sandee-eygo ^^^^^sandy-eggo ^^^^^i'll ^^^^let^^^^myself^^^^out"

"I told my therapist that I was hearing voices. He told me I didn't have a therapist."

"Why the Japanese kill fish? because Chinese eat fish and Koreans selfish"