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Joke of the Day

"How much did the pirate pay to have his ears pierced? a buck an ear"

"Two people have been killed and another seriously injured in a knife attack at an Ikea store in Sweden. Police are currently at the crime scene trying to piece the evidence together."

"What's the best song for a threesome You've got a friend in me."

"I like my women how I like my bicycles, chained up in the garage."

"To those who hate birds. I think they're pretty fly myself."

"I think the best way to reduce stress in your life is to be wealthy and attractive."

"How do trees browse the internet? They log in."

"What can I bring to your party? Friend: A six pack. [does 10 crunches] [cancels]"

"What was Bruce Lee's favorite hotel? HYATT!!!"

"I should probably never be a mom considering I'd rather drop a baby in a puddle than my iPhone"