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Joke of the Day

"What do vegan cannibals eat? Only vegetables."

"What type of cheese is made backwards? Edam"

"What is one thing that I would never give? I don't give a rat's ass!"

"What do you call having anal sex with a dick piercing? NSFW Prince Albert in a can"

"Optimus Prime: ""I transform from a robot into a truck. You?"" Amazon Prime: ""I transform money into regrettable internet purchases at 2 AM."""

"When a cow laughs..... does milk come out of her nose?"

"Did you all see the shots fired at the Democratic debate just now!!???? Hillary really took aim at Bernie over gun control."

"High school girls are a lot like heaven... ...hard to get in to. -[Dylan Mandlsohn](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-XwGpz91IDo)"

"Most women need a little reassurance. Like when she says ""oh, you want to see crazy?"" Reassure her that you do not."

"Auto-correct changed my ""I'm tired"" to ""shut the fuck up, you unemployed bitch""."