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Joke of the Day
"My boyfriend said we can't hang out this weekend because he doesn't exist."
Next Joke
"A doctor goes to write a prescription... He reaches into his pocket to take out his pen, but finds a rectal thermometer instead. Annoyed, he complains, ""Some asshole stole my pen!"""
"How many Psychologists does it take to change a light bulb? Just one. But the light bulb has to want to change."
"Did you hear about the wooden car with the wooden engine, the wooden doors and the wooden chassis? It wooden go."
"How do you say ""I surrender"" in french? ""Bonjour"""
"What does an American call a Canadian Dollar? A quarter."
"The Native Americans used to trust the white man, now they have their reservations."
"I've saved a ton of money on Birthday Cards by switching to Facebook!"
"*pulls up to window* Me: *on phone* Ok, so you want a chocolate shake also? Ok, I'll get two then. *phone rings while its at my ear*"
"Why did Ted get fired from his job? Because he would only do the _bear_ minimum?"