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Joke of the Day

"History of panties... 50 years ago you'd have to pull down her panties to see her ass. Today, you have to pull her ass apart, to see her panties."

"Yes, your honor, but in my defense I thought he was stung by a jellyfish"

"Why did the farmer win an award? He was outstanding in his field."

"Why did the worker get fired from the hp computer factory? He threw out all the computers with ""dy"" on them."

"Why did the hipster burn his mouth? He drank the coffee before it was cool "

"Prisons and psych wards in movies always make it seem like an indignity, but I think it'd be nice to receive food through a slot in my door."

"Something came in the mail today.... DEEZ NUTZ!!!! HA!!!! GOT HEM!!! GOT HEM!!!"

"One day two blind men started fighting. Pretty soon a crowd surrounded them. Then one of the members of the crowd yelled out ""I bet 10 bucks on the one with the knife."" Both men ran away."

"why did the cyclops close his school because he only had one pupil"

"I'm sponsoring this new group that teaches underprivileged children about basic math terms Upvote for divisibility"