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Joke of the Day

"What is the difference between arguing with a knife and arguing with your girlfriend? The knife has a point."

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"Love' is picking up tampons at the supermarket for your girlfriend. True love' is inserting them."
"Friend - You smell nice, what's that perfume you're wearing? Me - Fear and fabric softener."
"What do you call a cow with three legs? Tri-tip."
"Why didn't the math teacher sin? Cosecant."
"I tripped over my girlfriends bra.... I guess she planted a boobie trap."
"If you say ""Starbucks"" in the mirror 3 times, a girl in yoga pants will appear, steal your hoodie and tell you the best things about Fall."
"I met this guy who said he was a Mir Space Station cosmonaut. But I thought it was quite an achievement."
"What's it called when Obama and Paul Ryan meet up for dinner? A government mandate."
"What is the best way to stop rape? Consent"
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