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Joke of the Day

"British Airways. Breakfast in London. Dinner in New York. Luggage in Tokyo."

"""What do you tell a woman with two black eyes ? Nothing, somebody already told her twice"""

"My wife's so ungrateful The other day I gave her a massive orgasm, and she just spit it out."

"I poured my root beer into a square cup Now I just have beer"

"What's a snakes favourite dance ? The mamba !"

"Hey cat, how's about I lick myself for hours then puke where you sleep? Don't answer that. Why do I even talk to you. Stop looking at me."

"Q: What does a blonde make best for dinner? A: Reservations."

"When I'm on a date, ... I like to tell the girl that ""I'm available for a limited time only* In hopes that her shopping instincts will kick in."

"What do you call someone who sings about mints? A ""Minstrel""."

"What do you call a cow which can no longer produce milk? An udder failure."