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Joke of the Day

"Analysts are suprised Chris Christie ran for president in the first place They thought he'd walk"

"I sing like an amputee I can't hold a note, can't carry a tune..."

"When I die I already know my last words will be. ""but I'm still hungry"""

"I was once told there was nothing positive about the Bubonic Plague I think Malthus would disagree."

"What's the difference between a good joke and a bad joke?"

"I wonder what song The Little Mermaid was singing when she viciously ripped a clam in half to make that cute bikini top"

"(Not a joke) The Aristocrats I'm sure all of you had different forms or variations of The Aristocrats, but what's the best one you guys have heard?"

"Of all the advice given to me over the years, ""There really is no bad time for a beer"" has proved to be the most helpful. Thanks ma."

"My dentist and orthodontist have the same name... Isn't that coinci*dental*?"

"There are two words in life that will open a lot of doors for people Push and pull"