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Joke of the Day

"Cop: license and registration. Me: I don't carry my drivers license so I don't lose it. Cop: where is it? Me: I have absolutely no idea."

"Why did Davy Crockett always wear a coonskin cap? It was a birthday present from his wife!"

"I headed-butted a girl while we were making out. She told me we should just skip the fore-head-play."

"My only real regret in life is not pretending to be a shark in a heavily populated swimming area. But there's still time."

"I just got arrested for using my iPhone It looks like I'm going to Face Time"

"Are your parents bakers? Cause youre inbread."

"How does Hasbro test tickle me elmo's? They have test-tickles."

"Only 2 phrases can change a woman's mood: ""I Love You"" and ""50% Off""."

"A man died in a tragic skydiving accident. Some say he left an impact on the world."

"What should you do if you come across an elephant in the jungle? Wipe it off."