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Joke of the Day

"I just came across a group of elderly fish... Old School."

"Just saw a 13 year old kid reading an actual newspaper. I stopped and asked of he was okay, and if he'd lost his phone."

"I don't really care for the New England Patriots, but Lance Armstrong used a deflated ball for years and no one said anything."

"The main reason I got married is that I really hate driving.."

"Apparently it's okay for the office to have ""casual Friday's,"" but ""nudist Tuesday's"" are frowned upon. How embarrassing for me."

"For sale: 2 dead birds (Not going cheep)"

"Two sausages sitting in a frying pan... 1st sausage turns to the 2nd sausage and says, ""is it me? Or is it really hot in here? "" 2nd sausage says, ""HOLY SHIT! A talking sausage..."""

"I couldn't decide whether to be an environmentalist or a conservationist... ...so I killed two birds with one stone."

"Why did the lion get lost? Because jungle is massive"

"Nerdy pickup line. Hey baby, Are you uranium because I'm Iodine and if it was up to me I would rearrange the periodic table around and put U and I together. ;)"