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Joke of the Day

"On the Hot Wheels isle helping a friend pick out a sweet Corvette that she promised her 18yo for graduation. Life's all about the wording."

"[campfire] ME: They say these trees are over 200 years old. Man, if trees could talk... TREE: Please stop burning my flesh to cook hot dogs."

"And the Oscar goes to... ...Jail!"

"Have you heard that joke about pussy? I would tell it, but I don't get it."

"The original E*TRADE baby, Jaden Mills, died in an electrical fire 2 years ago."

"I've always had a problem finishing what I've started..."

"You wanna know what sucks about being single? Nothing. You gotta use your hands now."

"Mum Can I have a dog for Christmas ? No you can have turkey like everyone else !"

"Whats got two legs and bleeds? Half a dog!"

"I take offense to this subreddit... ...and use it to keep the animals out."