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Joke of the Day

"""Your resume says weaknesses: hide & seek"" Yeah ""Can you demonstrate?"" Sure, count to 10 *Counts to 10 & opens eyes* *I'm literally on fire*"

"Men vs Women Women want a lot of things from one Man. Conversely, Men want one thing from a lot of Women."

"girl at work scraped the frosting off her cake because there was 'too much' & it was 'too sweet' so I ate her frosting & then I ate her"

"I applied to Hogwarts the a few weeks back. Unfortunately, I didn't get accepted. Figured I could just Slytherin."

"Who called it your foot falling asleep and not coma toes?"

"How will Donald Trump build such a huge wall without congressional approval? By forcing every Juan to work on it."

"So, a catholic priest comes on a playground..."

"I caught someone stalking me so I stalked them right back. It got awkward sitting in the same tree staring at each other."

"A man walks into a bar. Now he watches where he's going."