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Joke of the Day

"""and god said LET THERE BE BUTTS and there were butts nice warm jiggly butts everywhere on every human"" - me 2:16"

"Want to hear a joke? Women's rights"

"Respect to this dude at CVS whose sole purchase is Frosted Flakes"

"They planned the date when the Burj Khalifa would be finished in advance... They wanted to know when it'd be due by"

"What do you call a demon that lives in your butt? An ass-soul"

"""Do you ever get the feeling Mitch is an undercover cop?"" [MITCH enters] MITCH: Hey guys! *speaking into shirt collar* I brought the drugs"

"""I'd tap that."" ~tap dancer, about a song he really likes"

"How does Yo-Yo Ma answer the phone? Cello?"

"What are two doctors with colds An ironic Paradox."

"A blonde sees a another blonde across a lake and asks ""How do I get to the other side?"" the other blonde replies... ""You are on the other side""."