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Joke of the Day

"If you broke up with your gf who works at a salad bar you can use the line ""lettuce romaine friends"" at a low cost of my student loans."

"I bought a high end stereo with a broken volume knob for $10. I couldn't turn it down."

"Who invented Bull Riding? Hey, I'm gonna hop on that 2,000 pound pissed off animal...Time me."

"What did the tomato say to the peach? ""Nice pits."""

"How many OU (University of Oklahoma) coaches does it take to change a light bulb? None. They aren't about to change a bulb when flipping a switch has worked for 15 years."

"How many Californians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Don't be silly, Californians screw in hot tubs!"

"When is an outlaw neither left-handed nor right-handed? When he's red-handed."

"When I'm not standing up or laying down, I have a seizure If I sit, I fit."

"Why was schrodinger's cat in trouble with the law? I don't know, but he was wanted dead and alive."

"What's a parrot's favourite song? I love Parrots in the Springtime!"