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Joke of the Day

"3 Bears This is a joke my father told me. Once upon a time, there were three bears. They came across a girl with pink hair, it made them so mad... They moved."

"Whats the difference between me and my couch My couch pulls out"

"I went to an Easter Egg hunt without a permit... ...They caught me poaching eggs."

"Man's guide for a selfie: 1) Squint your eyes like your cool 2) Look off into the distance 3) Put your phone down 4) Don't take the selfie"

"Her: I told you! Two beers and you're home at 10! Him: Oh, it was this way around."

"My friend asked me why I act so insecure when he would talk to my girlfriend. I don't remember what my answer was, but their son Malcolm turns two next month."

"A wife asks her husband... ""do you piss in the shower?"" ""Of course"" he replies. ""that's disgusting"" she shrieks ""but honey, I always piss when I take a shit"""

"How do you tell a British guy that it's his turn to play ball? ""Europe"""

"He was a good dog. He was a beautiful, very good dog. Who was a good dog? Who's a beautiful, good boy? Was it you? It was.Dog obituary"

"Had a little dog named Mustard, he didn't relish me so he ran away. I couldn't catch up."